Monday, December 10

I'm thankful for...

... God, for keeping me sane.

Really. 

image courtesy weheartit.com

As humans, we are born selfish. We will have this plethora of emotions, be it men or women, and we want our emotions to be addressed. Some individuals rather keep their emotions to themselves and suffer. Others throw tantrums in their own weird ways. 

I'm thankful that God keeps me sane albeit the multi-roles I play daily (well, almost)...

  • wife
As the woman to my man, I have to make sure I'm sane enough to share any burden he has. I need to be his support in anything (right) he does or decisions he makes. I need to be the person he can talk to when he's down. I need to be his listening ear if he needs to rant. I'm not the typical wife who only wants to see him bringing home the bacon and not give a hoot about his well-being. If the husband strays, the fingers will be point to the wife with quote, "The wife doesn't know how to keep her husband..." So we must know how to play our cards well and help in maintaining the happiness and love with our man. It's not easy, I tell you!

  • mother
Being a mother is never a simple task. Even though I have only one daughter (as of now), and even with a helper, it's not as if I don't do anything. I'm the bad person at home. My neighbours think I'm a mad mom who barks all day long because I'm always "yelling". I'm not yelling, I'm just trying to put my message across to my little girl who has double-dose-stubbornness (inherited from hubby & I) and my soft approach doesn't work on her when it comes to me. So when everyone else at home is using the soft-and-patient approach, who has to be the tigress? Me. I don't like it as I always fear my daughter will grow up hating me. But the typical mentality of outsiders if they see a rebellious & rude child, they will point their fingers to the mother of the child with quote,"It has to be the mom who did not teach her child some basic manners..." It's always the mothers' fault, people. Why?

  • teacher
My job requires me to educate preschoolers to portray all their colours of emotions and be expressive verbally and physically. For instance if a student of mine doesn't get good positive reports from me, I will be blamed by the parents for not being able to deliver the lesson good enough for their child to learn. Management and my agent can understand that the issue may be due to the child's learning ability or whatever underlying reasons. But the parent will point their fingers to the teacher with quote, "The teacher can't even teach, that's why my child don't learn..." So without finding out the core of the issue, the blame will be on the teacher. If you're a teacher reading this, have you had such experience before? I certainly did. Of course, at the end of the day, the problem was resolved as it was the child's issue & not mine but the parents were too egoistic to apologize. 

  • daughter
As a daughter, even though I'm married, I have a responsibility towards my parents and being the only child, it's not easy emotionally. Yes, it's important to have faith that God will guide us through making the right decision. If the choice flops, we have to stand up, dust the dirt off and move on, right? Yes, yes, yes.. I understand this theory. The fact that I have not done enough for my parents, especially my mother and there will never be THAT day where 'enough is enough'. As much as I'm emotionally fighting with myself every single day to sustain my sanity, no one, not even my mother can understand the plethora of emotions inside me every single living day. While I can't provide the best for my mom yet, the burning questions of outsiders will be, "What the hell have you been doing all these years?" The fact that the generation difference is apparent so when the theory clashes, the argument breaks out. To make sure our parents know that what works for their parenting days, doesn't mean it will work on this era, is tough shit. I hate arguing with my mom over disciplining my daughter and it's emotionally exhausting. On one hand, I'm not a mad dog, barking at every single wrong move my daughter make. On the other hand, when one uses the soft approach, the other has to use tough love. Yes, it doesn't work all the time, but it does work. I don't care how neighbours perceive of me when they hear me barking from my house. I don't want outsiders to point their fingers into my face and say I did not teach my child manners. What I do may be wrong to others, but it's just how I look and do things at my angle so long as I don't harm her physically or hurt her emotionally, I just wanna try different methods of disciplining sans frequent punishment.

  • daughter-in-law
This is an interesting one. I know there are many DILs who "spoil market" and treat their in-laws like a piece of crap. So with selfish DILs like that who exist in the world, makes the genuinely nice DILs look bad. I'm not saying I'm a fabulous DIL. I'm not. I don't always visit them despite their old age. I admit, I'm not the best they can be proud of. I admit I'm just not happy with their conversations whenever I visit or call them. I don't like it when complaints of my other SILs reach my ears. I don't like it when they complain so much yet behind all the anger is actually targeted at me. Majority of MILs will always blame their DILs for issues that arise between them and their son. If their son take sides, MILs will push all the blame to their DILs for "poisoning" their sons' mind and steal their son away from them and blah blah blah. Their son don't visit them often, they will complain to neighbours and relatives with quote,"Ya what, his wife only wants my grandchild to be close to her family side and not my son's side..." and the conversation doesn't seem to end for the next ten years. Seriously...? Both parties play a part. One has to stop complaining and the other has to learn to give in and remember that without that MIL of yours, you won't have your husband. We mothers will all be MILs one day too. By then, don't regret if your DIL is a nasty crap! I will quote, "I smell Karma.."!

  • Take home message
In life, we need to have a balance. Everyone in the family plays a part to keep each other sane. You need to be physically, mentally, emotionally and hormonally stable. Yes, faith plays an important part in our daily lives. I believe in standing firm with my beliefs and as long as my conscience is clear and I'm not harming anyone, however I wanna run my life and my family's, I will do it accordingly. I will take others' advices as a guide to run a smoother race and whatever flops, I will dust the dirt off my shoulders and continue my journey. I'm thankful to God for keeping me alive every single day and allowing me to watch and educate Sophia. I can be thankful for a million things in life, but I'm truly thankful for being sane. LOL! 

Have a great week moms (and dads)

Pomaika`i
A.

1 comment :

  1. Hahaha... blame the mother/woman. I think about this a lot of the time ;p

    But indeed, contentment and gratitude is key to living :)

    ReplyDelete

Mahalo!

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